Saturday, September 20, 2008

Low blow...

Yes this is a ranting post so if you're feeling too sunny or just plain don't like rants, you can leave. Ugh, you know in life you need at least one of the following things to keep you happy, healthy and glowing and (in no particular order) they are:
-A secure, well-paying job
-A secure, committed relationship
-A good relationship with ones family
If all of those are in tow, one must be completely pimple-free, radiant and just too happy for words. But we all know that all of those are sometimes too impossible to achieve or sometimes just too short-lived. For the past couple of months I have been losing a lot of my already thinning hair, I have been having a blast of pimples on my forehead, chin, etc. and I have been binge-eating everything in sight. Clearly, I am quite depressed. On top of some of the three things I just mentioned, being far away from home doesn't help either. I try to keep my chin up and go about my day everyday. I keep myself thoroughly distracted with a number of things from the latest makeup trends to the latest thai recipes. I am trying to go to the gym regularly as I have gained so much weight that another 5 pounds and I would qualify as borderline-obese, kid i not (I am NOT one of those girls whose a 120 pounds and complaining). Anyways, I don't think it would be too wise to explicitly state all the details of what exactly makes my life so ungreat here. Famously said, it takes one to know one. Prior to typing this, I glanced at the mirror at the hideous blue-black pimples that have taken over my otherwise semi-clear forehead. I think about all those people who are lawyers, doctors, etc. who have confirmed jobs awaiting them a year before their graduation and think that they probably wake up most days with this stride of confidence. The other day I met an old cohort in the women's locker room and she was just saying how abundant jobs are lined up for occupational therapists (her major) and they don't face 'such' problems of not finding jobs. I kind of froze for a second because that was just plain obnoxious and no I don't care whether she didn't realize what she was saying. I mean she said it after I explained about my not-being-able-to-find-a-job-due-to-f1-status thingamajig. I mean I feel good that some very good companies have contacted me and conducted phone interviews with me and that the only reason that stops them is (once again), me being a f1 visa. Anyways, moving on to the secure and committed relationship part--it's supposed to help you look beautiful and flood you with copious amounts of endorphins. Don't have that either. Lastly and probably the most important, a good understanding and relationship with your family. I would like to believe that I have a good relationship with my sister and parents. That's the only thing that is holding me together in this rough time. And yes, I do take the time out of everyday to thank god that I have a roof to sleep under, food to eat and hands and legs to function with. I am not for a second ungrateful...maybe just upset at the situations and circumstances of life. End of rant.


Anonymous said...


Lost-in-thought said...

Awww, it's good to know that you are hanging on. But hey, got to let it out sometimes. And you were even successful in that :) It’s just a matter of time.

Good Luck love and the pimples will go away (so that would mean all 3 things taken care of).


Anonymous said...

hey nafisa... well i deleted my facebook account and now in a fix as to how to contact you so your blog was the only way. Do pass your mail id... :)