Friday, October 19, 2007

Rambunctious I am not

Its 1:30 am, Saturday. Windy outside. Quiet inside. The occassional 'zooms' of automoblies can be heard- I live close to a highway. I just washed my face, put some jojoba oil on and am watching Giada De Laurentis on Food Network. She is in London and is giving a rundown of stuff like: Fish 'n' chips, Prêt-à-Porter and other London like food. I am unsure as to why I have started blogging again. Utter boredom could be a possible reason. Reiterating hidden thoughts and desires could be another.

I had a pretty productive day today. Work from 12 noon-4pm: So at 12 hours per week, I like work. Besides the fact that the pay is staggeringly low, the atmosphere is like that of a foreign embassy. I work at the International Admissions Office. A hustling and bustling part of UB's (University at Buffalo) infrastructure. Korean, Chinese, Malaysian, etc. all form part of the multi-cultural staff. After four hours of work I called my mom. She (along with my dad and sister) live in Oman. It is located in the Middle East bordering the Arabian Sea, Gulf of Oman, and Persian Gulf, between Yemen and UAE. I grew up there since I was a month old. (yes this is an impromptu intro). I was born in Bangladesh. I speak Bangla (native language of Bangladesh) at home with my parents. My parents won't stop ranting about the fact that me and my sister converse in English. I can semi-comprehend Arabic, written better than spoken. So anyways, I called mom. She misses me. I miss her too. She is one of the few people in this world who truly knows what I am thinking in that part of my head where no one can usually go. Its pretty cool.

After 28 minutes of heart-warming talk with her (daytime minutes beware), I headed to the gym. This is part of my 'Must-lose-20-pounds-before-going-home-this-winter' scheme. I have a ridiculously low basal metabolic rate. I could inhale air and gain weight. Okay, when I decided to blog, I had promised myself not to whine about weight-related matters but it really is a bothersome part of my life so it may jump in between the walls every once in a while. SO after 20 minutes of treadmill and 30 minutes of biking, I came home. I cooked some broccoli, mushrooms, red pepper, green pepper, zucchini, squash, red potatoes and ground chicken together (yes all that at one go). It wasn't too grisly tasting. After two huge bowlfuls of my mysterious stew, I wandered about my apartment thinking of what to do.

Sigh.

Sometimes, life is so strange. There are these inexplicable thoughts racing through my mind. I think of the last 6 years that I have spent here in the United States. I have been lucky to visit home every year so I am not complaining about the home-sickness part. I am belly-aching about what life holds for me. Somehow, everyone else in my life has their 'stuff' figured out. I feel like this forlorn pea...rolling away into a pool of uselessness. I am an Informatics, 2nd year student. I haven't even started revising my thesis proposal which is due in less than 4 weeks, instead I am browsing through people's profiles on facebook, checking out pictures of rihanna on google images to see how precisely she does her make-up and popping on my Ipod every now and then. And the reason I am losing focus is not because I am not earnest, but it's because the state of the program is very fragile. Teachers leaving, students complaining---it is a messy situation. Argh. Can't wait till the end of next semester when, hopefully, I will be shopping for a commencement gown. Never liked the way those things look on me. The feeling is good though.

Good feelings remind of all the people I have met in this program. Made a lot of friends who are such wonderful people. Beautiful inside out. Gowri for example, is such a beautiful girl with a heart of gold. We have shared some good times and continue to do so and its one of the things that I wouldn't have want to change because of an unstable program. I intend to complete a SAP training once I have done the 'walk' to supplement the unstableness which many a times only students in this program feel, while others don't. Good thing . Can't think of anything to write.

Media stuff- Britney Spears got a lip job or something and it is splashed all over the news. One question: There are other important things happening in other parts of the world like starvation, poverty, etc. Why is there so much emphasis on a lousy 20 somethings life? Oh God I hope that Chris Crocker guy doesn't kill me for writing this. Pshaw- talk about getting famous in the weirdest manners. I don't get this place sometimes.

Maybe some sleep will do me good now. It's too hot in my room.

Night.

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